Author Archives: Roy Ryder

Conflict and Positive Change in Egypt

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By now you’ve heard about the Egyptian military government’s bloody attack on the supporters of deposed former president Morsi and his Muslim Brotherhood. The last body count on the Wall Street Journal’s site was about 275, with the number likely to grow higher. The coordinated assault on squatter camps of protesters is occurring all around the country of Egypt and is meeting fierce but ultimately futile resistance. In addition to the sweep and clear, the nation is going into a 30-day state of emergency with martial law being issued in many areas.

The White House has condemned the violence and the 30-day state of emergency. Other condemnations are coming in from around the world. Even Egypt’s vice president, Mohamed ElBaradei has resigned in protest of the heavy handed action of the state.

All of those people are dumbasses.

These so-called leaders are the international political equivalent of co-dependent housewives. They are more concerned with maintaining a state that, while relatively free of large-scale violence, is saturated in small-scale violence and is entirely unworkable. They have attempted to co-opt the Muslim Brotherhood, an Islamic entity determined to destroy any form of Egyptian government other than their own, and are surprised not only at their failure, but that the majority of Egyptians think them idiots for doing so.

While the loss of life is regrettable, particularly the loss of those who are innocent or otherwise caught up in the mess, it’s certainly not the worst thing that can happen. What we are seeing is meatball surgery on the body politic of Egypt. There is a cancer that must be excised before the true healing can begin and the world’s most populous Arab nation can rejoin the rest of the world in the 21st century. If this operation fails and the cancer is allowed to metastasize, then 60 million people are condemned to a new dark age that threatens to pull the rest of the world in after it.

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True Story: How To Deal With A Nutjob Threat

This is a story that I’ve been sitting on for a couple of weeks as I wasn’t sure if it was worth telling or how to tell it. I figure now that it’s worth mentioning, even if it is just to give Real Revo readers a giggle. As for the telling, I guess I’ll just go with how it happened.

Two weeks ago, I was in church and teaching the men’s class in Sunday school (no that’s not a joke, although I’m sure some folks think it should be). We were discussing assignments for volunteers, including one for building security, which involves a nightly check to make sure the lights are out and the doors are locked. At that time, the leader of the group announced that there was a problem that we should be aware of.

It seems that the previous week, a man with a beef against Mormons, Catholics, and Christians in general had made some threatening remarks about making some big attack. The guy had a history of bizarre behavior and now claims to be some kind of Islamic jihadist. He was, in fact, wearing a towel on his head when police talked to him and he claimed that he had just returned from a jail in Israel, something nobody can confirm but sounds just plain nutty.

As one comment in a newspaper article about the threat put it, the cheese has done slid off this guy’s cracker.

We’ve learned the hard way here in Colorado after some shootings at local churches that you should never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups (liberals) or individuals motivated by chemical imbalances. Consequently, local law enforcement made it known to church leaders in the area that they’d be keeping their eyes open and doing a lot more patrolling on Sundays. My local leaders had quietly arranged for the men in the congregation with law enforcement experience to be “ushers” that day at services, something I’d completely missed.

Now we all knew about it. Somebody out there had the intent and possibly the ability to bring harm to us and our families in a place we viewed as sacred. We all looked at each other around the room and there was silence for a moment. Then, somebody said, “Well, I wished I would have known that before we came today. I’ve got a new treestand I’d like to try out.”

Pretty soon, we were all joking about setting up blinds in the parking lot or foyer and getting in a little early hunting. My personal contribution was that we should limit ourselves to archery or black-powder weapons only. You know, just to be sporting.

Once the jokes were out of the way we settled down and two men volunteered to pull security for the week. The fact that these two just happened to hold concealed weapons permits and each has an arsenal that would put a third-world dictator to shame was never mentioned.

After church, I thought about the whole thing and found it amusing, but I was also pleased with how it had been handled. There wasn’t any hue and cry for disarmament of the citizenry and nobody wailed “won’t somebody think of the children!”. Nobody screamed for victim status or debased themselves trying to make this obvious nut job not hate them. It was just calm thinking and enacting reasonable but non-intrusive measures that were, I believe, sufficient to deal with the problem.

I wish there was more of that. Don’t you?

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Obamacare: Bad for Local Government and Local Citizens

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The unnecessary burdens imposed on America by Obamacare have been known for some time and discussed at length here at The Real Revo. Obama’s Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act has real-world consequences that are just beginning to be felt. One of the most predicted and easily foreseen result has been the reduction of part-time employee. Darden Restaurants and Regal Cinemas both announced that part-time employees would be limited to 28 hours and other companies have done so more stealthily. Walmart has a de facto hiring freeze on full-time employees and limited hiring of part-time employees. Home Depot might have a hiring freeze, but I’ve never been able to find an employee there to ask.

But, Obamacare’s  effects aren’t limited to private companies. Small governments are subject to the same requirements and having the same reactions, resulting in fewer hours for part-time employees with city or school jobs.

Phillipsburg, Kan.: “School administrators here say they are alarmed and confounded by the looming new costs they face with the implementation of the Affordable Care Act,” according to the Kaiser Health Institute News Service. Chris Hipp, director of a Kansas special education cooperative, warned that ObamaCare’s costs “could put us all out of business or change significantly how we do business,” adding that “we are not built to pay full health benefits for noncertified folks who work a little more than 1,000 hours a year.”

For some part-time employees, Obamacare means a reduction in paychecks by $3000 and still no insurance coverage. Low-wage, low-education citizens will have to get two jobs to get enough to survive and still won’t qualify for insurance. If they are young and single, they’ll pay up to 150% more for private insurance through Obamacare-mandated insurance exchanges that have yet to be built and which many insurance companies have announced they’ll avoid.

What this means for you and me is that there will be fewer people working less hours in local government to take care of the things that we deal with most often: community roads, schools, parks, fire and police departments, etc.  So, the next time you hit a pothole or see overflowing trash bins at the park or wonder why there are fewer cops on the road, thank Obama and the Democrats.

Heckuva train wreck there, Barry.

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The Next Obama Scandal

The IRS made a surprise admission today that IRS employees not only targeted “tea party” groups applying for non-profit status for enhanced review, but that IRS employees actively hunted down and murdered many of the applicants. IRS spokesperson Robert Pilatus made the announcement in a morning briefing and emphasized that all those involved in the killings were low-level employees and that all had been disciplined for their actions.

“We provided terrible customer service when our employees kidnapped applicants and let them loose in a remote natural preserve where they were hunted down and killed by IRS employees.  The IRS administration does not condone this kind of activity and it certainly did not come from any direction from our God Emperor in the White House.” Pilatus later noted that the blood of the applicants may have been offered to an image of a person who bears a remarkable likeness to President Obama, but that it was done on employee private time.

When asked about the revelation, White House Spokesman Jay Carney stated that the Obama Administration had no knowledge of the killings and that it opposed the use of murder to advance their political agenda. When asked about bloody handprints on oval office windows and ritual chanting and beating drums heard from the West Wing, Carney replied that sequestration cuts by Republicans were responsible.

CBS reporter Sharyl Attkisson attempted to ask a follow-up question but was unable to do so after a dart struck her neck and she fell over dead in the press room. CNN reporter Candy Crowley noted the death but later stated that general consensus was that the death was of natural causes.

The admission of murder for sport by the IRS has made many wonder if Obama, already struggling to implement his second term agenda, will be able to move on from this latest scandal

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Greg Gutfeld: The Media is Obama’s Scandal Condom

There’s really nothing more to say. It’s just too true.

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An Open Letter to Gay Athletes That Want To Come Out

Go to Hell.

Go straight to Hell.

Don’t go Hell because of moral or religious reasons. Don’t go to Hell because the Bible says homosexual sex is a sin. And don’t go to Hell because you’re normalizing the abnormal.

Go to Hell because you’re contributing to the destruction of one of the great things in life. Go to Hell because you’re helping to damage something you love as much as we do, and probably more. Go to Hell because you’re hurting Sports.

Sports is about competition, sportsmanship, struggling against human limitations, overcoming the odds, and grace in motion. Sports is about teamwork, individual effort, sacrificing oneself for the greater good, and pushing boundaries both physical and emotional. Sports is about community, camaraderie, rivalries, and winning and losing with class. It’s all that and more.

It’s not about where you like to put your dick.

When the lovers of Sport see an athlete, male or female, we see a human being that has through sweat and exertion become a finely honed physiological and mental machine. We see muscles and brains and ego and attitude and we admire that because they are admirable. We see excellence and example and something to emulate. We see ourselves on something better than our best days and we see what can be possible for the species and we love it.

And when you talk about being gay or straight or vegisexual or whatever, you’re none of those things. You’re just somebody who wants to get laid and that’s just base.

Sports is already tainted enough. It’s tainted by money, drugs, gambling, and all kinds of other things. It’s tainted by business deals, merchandising, and drunk driving and the human frailty that we all suffer from. So, don’t taint Sports further by bringing sex into something that’s not about sex.

If you’re gay, so what? Do it on your own time, just like everyone else. Don’t bring it onto the court or the field or the track. Because when you’re there, we want to see an athlete. And if you’re good, if you perform and play hard and win our hearts, we’ll cheer for you because you earned it as an athlete.

Sincerely,

Roy Ryder

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If Norks Fire a Missile We Can Shoot It Down

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North Korea and its juvenile leader, Kim Jong-un, is an international irritation on par with a global hemorrhoid. In the latest round of jackassery, the Norks have manufactured a crisis with South Korea and the United States and appear to be getting ready to test launch a medium-range ballistic missile. The test missile will likely have a dummy warhead and it’s not believed that the Norks know how to condense down a nuclear weapon to fit onto the missile anyway.

The Nork missile, known as a Musudan type, is based on an old Russian submarine-launched missile that has been converted to launch from the ground. It is a liquid-fueled weapon and is estimated to have a range of 3500 kilometers (2175 miles to us ‘Mericans). It’s believed that the Norks have about 50 of them but they’ve never been test fired, which is pretty important since a lot of Nork missiles tend to self-destruct after only a short distance.

Against this dummy warhead loaded, potentially self-destructing, never-tested old Russian designed missile is a wide array of modern anti-missile systems put in place by the South Koreans, United States, and Japanese. Here’s a roundup of information that’s been released to the public:

South Korea: The South Koreans opted not to join with the US in creating a missile defense and were planning on rolling out an indigenous system in July. (Guess they shoulda hurried, huh?) However, they’re not entirely defenseless. Several Patriot missile systems and early warning radar systems have been deployed around Seoul and the larger ROK military bases.

Japan: Two destroyers with Aegis advanced anti-missile systems have been deployed by the Japanese to the Sea of Japan. Advanced Patriot PAC-3 missile interceptors, which have a 30 kilometer range and are used to target missiles and warheads on their terminal entry, have been moved around Tokyo other sites.

United States: Despite the Norks claims to be able to destroy Austin (much to the delight of the rest of Texas) they’ll be lucky to even come close to Guam. The US Army is deploying its THADD (Terminal High Altitude Area Defense) system to Guam, which is effectively a ground-based version of the Aegis anti-missile system. More importantly, the US Navy has a total of five Aegis-equipped cruisers or destroyers in that part of the world and they are working with the Japanese Aegis vessels.

In short, there are a whole lot of people watching for the Nork missile that would love to demonstrate their expensive anti-missile systems on a real, live target. If Lil’ Kimmy fires off one or more of his missiles in any direction that offers a vague hint of a threat, he could get a humiliating demonstration of just how ineffective they are and how powerless he is.

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Thieves Discouraged From One Target Pick Next Easiest

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Anyone interested in home security or personal protection knows that the best way to avoid being robbed is to not look like easy prey. Whether it’s having some kind of burglar alarm on your home, staying in a group, or even just walking like a mean baddass, a measure of safety can be had in making yourself look like a target that is too much effort for the payoff. This is because muggers, pimps, thieves, and general reprobates are predators who will almost always take the path of least resistance and look for easier pickings.

Politicians are, of course, of the same breed as muggers, pimps, thieves, and general reprobates, with prostitute and drug addict characteristics thrown in.

In Cyprus, the government agreed to sell out its own citizens by forcibly taking between 6% and 10% of income in Cypriot banks. The politicians claim they were forced into it by the mean European Central Bank, the International Monetary Fund, and other less savory characters, but the truth of the matter is that they were going to rob their own people so that they could acquire more money from the loansharks previously mentioned. After the plan became widely known and Cypriots raced to the bank to get their money out before it could be stolen, they quickly voted down the agreement that had previously been acceptable when nobody knew about it.

But that’s not the end of the story. Like burglars discouraged by row after row of houses with bars on their windows, the dirtbags simply look elsewhere to feed their crack habits:

Mavrides [a member of Cyprus’ parliament and a former finance minister] said that the government was trying to renegotiate the deal with the Eurogroup, which had left open the option of Cyprus itself coming up with the money it needs to keep its banking system afloat.

“We have some ideas. We are thinking of nationalising the pension funds and provident funds of the state employees. That is about €2bn to €3bn, and we do have some other ideas which will come up in the next few days.”

For anyone who doesn’t think that this could be coming here, remember that although most state pension funds in the US are underfunded and in deep trouble, there are billions of dollars to be had in them. Moreover, the fact that they are underfunded could be used as an excuse by an immoral administration within the federal government to seize them with the promise to pay the pensioners out of tax revenues.

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The Italian Election, Obama and America’s Future

Bread and Circuses

No doubt all of you were just glued to your computers and televisions awaiting the outcome of yesterday’s Italian elections.

No, really. Italy had an election. Yes, Italy. It’s that one country in southern Europe that looks like the kind of boot worn by a transvestite or a hooker or a transvestite hooker. Italy is the country that makes Fiat cars (Fix It Again, Tony), towers that lean way more than they should, and some damn fine food if you don’t mind carbohydrates. It’s also Europe’s third-largest economy and pretty important if you want to keep the Euro, or at least the fiction of the Euro.

Back to the elections. Who won? Well, that’s kind of hard to say because no party won a clear majority of votes. The party that got the most votes is run by a former standup comedian named Beppe Grillo (yes, I know it sounds like a brand of $0.10 cigar). The party that got the second-most votes is run by a former Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi, who is currently on trial for fraud and having sex parties with under-age girls. The most recent prime minister, Mario Monti, actually came in fourth behind a center-left party and a three-legged dog.

So, why is this important to us ‘Mericans? Because more than half of Italy’s voters cast ballots for candidates that intentionally lied to them and allowed those voters to ignore the economic reality that their government was spending them into a grave. Both Grillo and Berlusconi are populists who have gained power by promising to spend money their nation doesn’t have and screaming “all is well” while Rome burns around them.

More below the fold…

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Congresscritter Warns Mobs Will Riot Unless We Pay Them

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Rep. Jim McDermott (D-WA) wants to make sure that we all understand the there is a seething underclass just waiting to erupt in a torrent of mob violence, much like the French Revolution. He sees the reason for this potential eruption as the lack of “equity” in America, which is a Marxist code word for “let’s take their money”. The only solution McDermott has is to lull this horde of potential monsters to sleep with massive social programs that care for their every whim from cradle to grave.

Of course, McDermott takes no blame for being one the jackholes that’s created the craptacular shrinking economy we have. He also refuses to accept that the massive welfare state he desires must be paid for.

He also fails to realize that the “takers” aren’t the ones who we should fear. It’s the producers who are being robbed on a daily basis and chained with debt they didn’t endorse that are the most likely to start yelling in the street and demanding metaphorical heads.

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An Open Letter to Liberal Americans

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To Liberal Americans,

Since the re-election of President Barak Obama, I have seen an inflated sense of progressivism within America. A form of euphoria from the 2012 electoral victory has swept through you and the mainstream media has emboldened you to push even your most extreme dreams. You are resurrecting far-left agendas that have long been put aside or ignored. You believe that you have the weight of electoral victory behind you and that gives you vindication of your ideals and the authority to remake the world as you desire it.

You do not.

More below the fold…

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The Muslim Brotherhood’s Torture Chambers

Beneath the robes of Egypt’s Muslim Brotherhood you’ll find brownshirts and swastikas. Egyptian President Morsi tried to give himself Hitler-like unassailable power and enshrine sharia into the Constitution, spurring protests from people who recognize a dictator in the making. However, the Muslim Brotherhood is not just a political party, they’re their own police state, with the power to arrest, beat, and torture those who oppose them.

The Brotherhood gave a first class tour to reporters for the Egyptian newspaper Al-Masry Al-Youm so the paper could spread the word about the fate awaiting those who don’t fall into line. The story was picked up by Al Monitor web site and republished by Israeli newspaper Arutz Sheva.

Bearded Muslim Brotherhood police and security officials, some in civilian clothes and some in military uniforms, supervise 15 bearded men who carry out whippings and beatings of demonstrators arrested for opposing Egyptian President Mohammed Morsi.

Of course, there is more than one torture chamber, as that would be inefficient. The Brotherhood likes to have chambers as close to the site of arrest as possible. This one just happened to be outside the presidential palace.

The most common form of torture was simple beatings. However, that doesn’t mean they won’t branch out in the future to more sophisticated stuff. Still, beatings seemed to be good enough, as some victims were beaten so badly they were unconcious.

The place left an impression on the reporters.

“We left the place and found blood flowing on the sidewalk of the palace,” wrote the Al-Masry reporter. “Someone had tried to cover the blood with soil to remove it. However, no one will be able to clean the image of this blood from the memory of Egyptians for hundreds of years.”

Remember, this is the group that Obama and Hillary want to engage with. It’s a pity that Neville Chamberlain is dead.

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Student Loan Delinquencies Accelerate Like Economy Used To

Once again Obama’s mantra of Forward has been hit by the ugly reality created by his Forward policies. This time it’s the student loan bubble. Thanks to the strangled economy created by our “Lord and Savior”, 53% of newly graduated people are unemployed or underemployed, and it’s starting to show.

Per today’s NY Federal Reserve credit report, 11% of student loans, $956 billion, are now delinquent by 90+ days. However, that’s the good news. Because student loans can be deferred or have a grace period, the 11% is only half the story. The NY Fed thinks the real number of delinquent student loans is likely 22%, or about $1.9 trillion dollars.

The Fed calls this an “anomaly”, which is kind of like saying that the cancerous tumor on your neck is an “anomaly”.

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Going Galt and Charities

As part of the new Revoista “Going Galt” I have a philosophical quandary that I want to present to the group for your input. I have sufficient for my needs (but not a whole lot more) and I donate to charity and I tithe to my church (which also does a lot of charity work). It just so happens that my workplace annual charity drive occurred on Wednesday and we were given the opportunity to donate to various groups. After Tuesday, I was not in a good mood and my first thought was “these assholes voted for the other asshole, so screw’em”.

However, I’ve started to wonder if I’m being too harsh. Obviously, I want to donate to a charity that is efficient, but am I actually working against my own self-interests by unknowingly contributing to one that promotes an agenda that supports the people I’m working to get the hell away from? Are there charities out there that deserve what little extra I can provide and will encourage people to Go Galt (or at least be productive)? If so, what are they?

I’ll continue to tithe, and I’m happy to do so, so that’s not even on the table. Just the charities are under my mental scrutiny. Your thoughts are appreciated.

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American Cassandra

Are you familiar with the legend of Cassandra? A character in the Greek myths, she was a princess of Troy, sister of Helenus (the same who launched a thousand ships), and able to predict the future. She was also believed to be insane because no one would believe her predictions of doom for the great city of Troy.

Here, on the morning of November 7, I feel a lot like Cassandra. The election of 2012 is a bitter pill to swallow. Mitt Romney is a good man and was a very good candidate. He ran a first-rate campaign and presented the American people with a stark choice between visions of America. Obama offered the quiet and gentle slumber of the well-cared-for slave of the system while Romney showed that through blood, sweat, and tears all Americans can rise and prosper. The populous voted on the path and more chose the easy downward slope toward mediocrity and the bane of punishing achievement.

Sometimes you can do all the right things and it still doesn’t work out. That’s life. So be it. But that doesn’t mean that we should stop being the voice of reason, the American Cassandra. While Cassandra is a tragic figure, and her prophecies didn’t stop the eventual destruction of Troy (although I like to think that I would have been leery of the damn horse), she was true to herself. She never stopped warning, never stopped trying to do the right thing. And that is something to be proud of.

And so, we must continue to work for the conservative cause because it’s right and gives, and has given, more people more prosperity and the opportunity for happiness than any other philosophy of fallible human beings. And, we must continue to warn the American people of the consequences of their choices because, unlike the Trojans, our destiny isn’t written by low-brow gods on Olympus: America’s destiny is in our own hands.

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Siamese Elephants

After four years of Obama and months and months of campaigning, I’m feeling wrung out and I bet a lot of you are, too. Consequently, here’s a little relief from possibly the funniest people in history. I saw this on TV when I was a kid and I’ve remembered it fondly for 35 years or so.

Siamese Elephants

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Responses to Liberal Excuses for Obama’s Loss

I don’t want to count my chickens before they hatch, but I think there is a very good chance that the people of the United States will elect Mitt Romney to the office of the President this coming Tuesday. While it’s possible that the vote is so close as to require an ugly situation like the 2000 election and the delayed verification, I believe that the margins of Romney’s victory will be sufficient to allow the outcome to be without doubt.

When this happens, liberals will be emotionally devastated. Obama sold himself to them as a secular charismatic messiah who would make all their socialist dreams come true. Those that have remained avid Obama supporters through the past four years are the true believers, the ones who have ignored the failures, the quicksand economy, and all the other ills that Obama has inflicted on us. They will be unable to accept Obama’s defeat and will lash out like immature adolescents at their perceived betrayal by their fellow Americans. I want to be ahead of the curve and have responses ready for them.

Obama didn’t lose and the election was stolen: This is the hardest to respond to because it’s so driven by specifics, but there are some generalities that can be stated. Elections in the United States are usually free and fair. Most people in county and state positions to conduct and monitor the election are trustworthy and there are safeguards in place to prevent tampering. Moreover, many locations have independent monitors (including from the UN for crying out loud). Unless there is solid evidence of intentional tampering, the election should stand.

More below the fold…

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Revised Unemployment Picture Looks Ugly For Obama

Remember the horsepucky jobless rate that the Labor Department released a couple of weeks ago? The one where Obama’s Department of Labor tried to convince us that a gazillion jobs had just been found?

Everyone with an IQ higher than a houseplant looked at those numbers and realized that they were pure 100% bullflop. Jack Welch, the former CEO of General Electric, openly said that the numbers were cooked. A lot of Democrats, desperate for good news for Obama, tried shout about how great the economy was but it was hard to hear them over the sounds of stores and factories being boarded up.

Well, guess what. It’s looking like those numbers really were crap. ADP previously stated September had 162,000 new jobs in the private sector.  However, ADP revised how it counts its numbers (it’s partnering with Moody Analytics) to be more accurate and the previously rosy picture for September has been slashed almost in half. Instead of 162,000 new jobs created last month in the private sector, ADP is reporting only 88,200 new jobs.

The Bureau of Labor Statistics will release its own revised figures for jobs created in September, and if ADP’s revised numbers are any indication, then hurricane Sandy isn’t the only big storm to hit Obama this week.

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Swami Ryder Alert: Media Provides Excuses for Obama’s Upcoming Loss

A while back, I put on my $3 turban from the discount Halloween store and was struck with the power of prophecy. It was really prophecy and flatulence, but let’s just stick with the first one.

My main prophecy was that by mid-October you’d be able to tell that Obama was done for. Here we are at October 23rd and Obama is behind in most polls and there’s a palpable stink of desperation coming from the White House. I also made a few predictions about how the media would begin to look for someone to blame for the fiasco that is the Obama 2012 campaign. Although I initially said that the media would turn on the Obama election campaign staff as the guilty party, my prodigious powers of prophecy (and flatulence) has failed me. Instead of turning on Axelrod and Ploufe and Chicago, they’ve turned on themselves.

Alec MacGilles writes in The New Republic (a magazine that is to liberal stupid as Saudi Arabia is to oil) that the real killer of the Obama campaign was not a recovery strangled in the crib, not a force-feeding of a diseased healthcare plan, and not a feckless foreign policy of self-abasement. No, the real killer is, and has been, the media in its never-ending drive to come up with a good comeback story. MacGilles states that “The Narrative” of the Romney’s stomping of Obama in the first debate was so powerful and so overwhelming that it forced the media to report it and build a self-fulfilling prophecy of Romney superiority.

MacGilles’ theory nicely allows liberals to ignore such facts as Obama’s re-election was ruined by Obama somewhere between 2009 and 2012, and that the liberal agenda has been as popular as a dead squirrel in a punchbowl since 2010. It also allows liberal journalists (but I repeat myself) to see themselves as victims of their own awesome powers, as if they are capable of accidentally killing that which they love, like some kind of cross-eyed William Tell. It also lets them forget for a few blessed moments that the mainstream media is held in the same popular esteem as those pegs you use to wipe crap off your shoe.

Hold on, I feel another prophecy coming on….never mind. It wasn’t prophecy after all. It was that second thing. You might want to light a match.

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A Badass Man Doing Badass Things

Regular readers of The Real Revo know that we have a strong respect for badass people who do awesomely badass things. This includes the military, and not exclusively that of the United States. Aficionados of badassery know that one particular group of hyper-badasses are the Gurkas, a people from Nepal who serve in the British and Indian militaries and are apparently made of some form of organic titanium. Recent evidence of Gurka badassery include one former Gurka who defeated a Taliban assault in Afghanistan by beating them off with a machine gun tripod. Another case involved dozens of thieves stopping a train to rob it and coming out minus several thieves and limbs.

In the most recent case of Gurka badassery, a Gurka veteran was attacked at an ATM by a scumbag armed with a knife. Taitex Phlamachha broke the scumbag’s knife, beat on the perp for a while, and then held onto him until the police arrived.

It wasn’t until the police used a metal detector to find the broken blade that Phlamachha realized that first five inches of the knife was in his left arm.

Let’s recap:  Phlamachha broke the bad guy’s knife using his own flesh. Then, while holding the knife fragment safely in the folds of his tricep, he beat the guy into submission and held him for the cops. He didn’t notice the five-inch-long piece of metal embedded in his arm until someone later said “Holy crap! You’ve got a five-inch piece of metal in your f****** arm!”

Taitex Phlamachha, you are a badass and we salute you!

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Obama Actually Thought He Won the Debate!

File this under Are You F****** Kidding Me?!: After the most recent debate, the one in which Romney abused Obama like an inflatable love toy at a biker festival, Obama left the podium thinking that he’d actually won. In an amazing display of self-deception, Obama honestly believed he’d performed pretty well, according to the best journalism source available regarding America’s President Obama – the UK’s Mail Online.

The debate has been universally accredited as a disaster from Obama. Romney was revealed to the world to be smart, charming, funny, and entirely presidential while Obama managed to look like he was a reluctant visitor from a group home. The Left has blamed the moderator, the lack of teleprompters, and generally everyone except their Demigod. Psychoanalysts around the country have reported their phones ringing off the hook as limp-wristed liberals suffer a devastating attack of reality.

How did this happen?

It happened because Obama was too much of a douchebag to bother to prepare for one of the most fundamental confrontations of the entire campaign. He thought so little of Romney that he blew off preparations the day before the debate to go sightseeing at The Hoover Dam. He ignored his aides and refused to use prepared remarks, including one-liners about Romney’s “47%” comments. In short, he relied on what he believed was his own gifts, only to find out that he’s not nearly as awesome in reality as he dreams he is in his own mind.

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The Unemployment Rate of 7.8% is a Lie

Obama’s Labor Department announced today that the unemployment rate fell to 7.8%, a full 0.2% below the 8% that has hung around Obama’s neck like a millstone. It’s amazing that after 43 months of craptacular unemployment, just before the election it should drop into the “shitty but better” range, as opposed to the “simply shitty” range we’ve been in for so long.

Yeah, amazing because it’s crap.

The household survey, the part that is used to calculate the unemployment rate, isn’t based on real numbers. It’s mostly an educated guess by the Labor Department (Obama’s Labor Department). Real numbers would be something like official payroll numbers, but those take a long time to collect and the household survey has been used for a long time, so everyone kind of figures that in.

Unless you screw around with how you calculate the household survey. Based on today’s report, the household survey numbers are the best since 1983. You tell me if that feels right.

The reason we’re now at 7.8% is because OBAMA’S Labor Department decided that they needed to increase the number of people employed by THE GOVERNMENT over the previous two months.

Labor Secretary Linda Solis: “Hey! Surprise! We found a whole shit-load of people we didn’t know were employed! They were just in the back and the new guy forgot to count them.”

They have also decided that part-time employment is just like full-time employment and so they get counted just like full-time employed people. I’ll be sure to tell my nephew that his part-time job is just like a full-time job. That will make sleeping on his mother’s couch because he can’t afford an apartment so much easier.

Simply put, Obama is so desperate to win that he’s outright manipulating data to make himself look better.

What a dirtbag.

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China Threatens Japan: Why Now?

With the American Presidential election is under way and the Middle East enjoying another cycle of crazy, it’s easy to forget that the rest of the world is out there. Something important is happening in the Pacific, and it ain’t good for us.

There is a set of uninhabited and gawdforsaken rocky islands off the coast of China called the Senkaku (if your Japanese) or the Diaoyu (if you’re Chinese). They are about 100 nautical miles north of Taiwan (which the PRC doesn’t recognize) and 200 miles south of Okinawa (which the Japanese sure as hell recognize). These were administered by the US until 1972 and nobody really gave a shit about them other than as an impediment to maritime travel. However, the Japanese government recently purchased the land for whatever reason from the owners (who were probably delighted to find a buyer) and pissed off the Chinese, who claim that the islands are theirs by right of history or whatever.

More below the fold…

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A Post In Which I Incite a Riot and Obama Deplores Me

I’m going to start a riot with this post and be deplored by the Obama administration. Granted I’m making it easy because the intended rioters are militant Muslims and they’ll riot over anything. Even nothing. Which is what I’m going use.

Hold onto your butts. Here goes:

That’s it. That’s all I need. Because behind that doodle is Muhammad. Not just a Muhammad, like so many people are named, but THE Muhammad. The one who wrote wrote the Koran after supposedly receiving revelation from Allah. That Muhammad.

And for that cartoon, and all the riots and deadly carnage that it causes, the State Department and President Obama deplore me. They deplore anyone who uses their God-given First Amendment rights to do or say something that might set off Islamic militants. Some left-leaning fascists would like to have me arrested and my work banned. It doesn’t matter that the rioting Islamic militants are murderous criminal bastards intent on destroying America and the cartoons or movies or whatever are a flimsy pretext. Somehow, that doodle or movie or whatever are to blame and Obama and Co. want the Islamists to stop being bad, even if they have to ignore the Bill of Rights to do it.

Now, here’s a guy that looks just like Muhammad, but his name isn’t Muhammad.

It’s Billy Bob. Billy Bob isn’t Muhammad. Billy Bob was born in Colorado in 1988 and drives a Chevy. He just likes to wear Arab clothing because he thinks it’s cool. Billy Bob at a lot of lead paint flakes as a kid, but hey, it’s his choice.

For that image, no riots, no stoning or decapitation. Moreover, the State Department and President Obama don’t care. Why? Because Billy Bob isn’t what Islamists are screaming about and Billy Bob and Obama doesn’t have have the instinct to bow and grovell for it.

But you know what? I lied. It really was Muhammad again. I guess I should wait for the Islamists to come get me. I hope they get here before the Obama administration does.

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How to Handle Embassy Attacks

The recent wave of coordinated attacks on American and Western embassies around the Middle East has led to the deaths of an American ambassador and several other Americans. The German Embassy in the Sudan has been burned and its occupants are in hiding. The nations that these embassies reside in have done next to nothing to prevent, and in some cases colluded with, the aggressors, who are known Islamic militants.

Our President has spent his entire time in office bowing to, apologizing to, and exalting our enemies and this is the natural outcome of his actions. The Arab Spring that the Obama administration praised and cultured has grown a crop of murderous Islamic extremists that now lash out at us. Thanks to Obama’s feckless “lead from behind” failure, Pax Americana is dead and our nation is neither feared nor respected.

Embassies are considered the territory of the ambassador nation and receive diplomatic protection and special privileges. However, the real protection given an embassy is not in laws or agreements, but in the power projection of its nation. Our enemies rightly consider Obama a weakling, and so they have no fear of retaliation.

This wasn’t always so. The embassy is American territory, and it should be defended as such. The attackers are trained and coordinated, but they are few. If we have but the will to use the force necessary for defense, these attacks will stop and America will again be remembered as a nation NOT TO BE FUCKED WITH.

Here’s an example of how to mount an effective defense.

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1csr0dxalpI 

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