Author Archives: Bman

Bernie Sanders Fails To Gain Coveted NORK Endorsement

InsideNorthKorea11
DPRK News Service

@DPRK_News U.S. Senator Bernard Sanders dismissed as witless oaf peddling false socialism to degenerate blockheads.

He’s toast.

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Hillary Wins By Coin Toss

Heads I win lose, tails you lose.

That’s what democracy looks like.

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The tRUMP Cult

TRUMP-LIVES-620x605

I have no words for this. It’s no different than the cult following that Herr Obama had back in ’08. This poster scares the shit out of me. It reminds me of those pamphlets that the Jehovah Witness’ leave on your doorstep, portraying graphic images of sinners being cast in a lake of fire for being non-believers. In this poster, we see lost souls enthusiastically following a false prophet which will ultimately lead to their doom.

I don’t think it’s a parody.

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Jack In The Box

jack in the box

We need another flood.

A sex toy company created a tiny male masturbation fort in New York City. No, we don’t condone it.

On Tuesday, Hot Octopuss erected what it called a “GuyFi” booth on 28th Street and 5th Avenue in New York City, where men could, in theory, go to “relieve stress.”

The company simply put a cloth over a phone booth in what amounted to a marketing gimmick. Inside was a chair and a laptop.

Hot Octopuss was inspired by a Time Out survey, which concluded that 39% of the New York men it questioned admitted to masturbating while at work. A more expansive Glamour survey of 1,000 men in 2012 suggested 31% of its readers have done so.

Hot Octopuss created the booth so men can “take this habit out of the office and into a more suitable environment designed to give the busy Manhattan man the privacy, and the high-speed Internet connection, he deserves.”

“We may be insinuating that these booths could be used in whichever way anyone would like to ‘self soothe,'” a representative tells Mashable, “but the brand is not actively encouraging people to masturbate in public as that is an illegal offense.”

The company claims approximately 100 men used the booth on its inaugural day.

New York values…

Don’t bother

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Merry New Year’s Eve!!

Party like its 1967!
More below the fold…

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Three Letters From Teddy

troubled-kid

This is a story about more than kindness; it is about the essence and the power that compassion offers all humanity.

Teddy’s letter came today, and now that I’ve read it, I will place it in my cedar chest with the other things that are important in my life. “I wanted you to be the first to know.” I smiled as I read the words he had written and my heart swelled with a pride that I had no right to feel.

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Happy Thanksgiving: 1987

I saw this movie back in 1987 with my older brother; “Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.” It was just he and I. No parents. We went together on Thanksgiving Day. It was the first time that I can recall that we stopped being typical bickering brothers, and actually started forming a relationship….a friendship. I was 14. He was 18 and just out of high school. We drove to the matinee’ in his “Lead Sled”, which was a 1964 Chevy Impala, (he still has it to this day, and boy does it still look like shit….but I would honestly be saddened if he no longer had it). I thought it was a cool ride, especially when mom and dad weren’t in the car with us. I could say the “S” word as much as I wanted.

This movie was a bonding experience for my brother and I, at least in my eyes. As trivial that day may have been to my brother, it was a day I will always remember. It was a good day, and I give Thanks for it. I could go on in detail, but I want to keep that memory just for me. It only seems like 28 years ago….

Happy Thanksgiving Big Brother!

It’s this scene that gets me every time.

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Thirty Years Ago This Month…

…the gayest thing in professional sports happened.

This pretty much sums up the 80’s.

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University of North Dakota’s New Nickname

You may have been following the controversy for the past 5 or 6 years about the NCAA forcing the University of North Dakota to change its nickname the Fighting Sioux, (the name they have used since the early 1930’s), which was viewed by 7 or 8 people in the state who thought of it as “hostile and abusive” in nature…and don’t forget racist, too! Never mind that in the state of NoDak, there are 4 high schools who use Indian Native American Native People as mascots. Try and guess where they may be located.

But now, it’s officially over. The people have spoken at the ballot box. I present to you the new name of the University of North Dakota… More below the fold…

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GOP Debate Open Thread Part 4: Who Gives A Rats Ass

It’s that time again. Septum, Donuts, Huckster, and Jindal have spoken. Time for the tier one folks. Why isn’t Jindal in the tier one debates, btw?

rebublican

Donuts was especially aggressive on attacking Shitlary. I will give him that.

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What Three Books Would You Take Back To The Future?

I know this is MadBrad’s responsibility here, but I’m using my RealRevo Membership card. It has great perks. I use it to get discounts on pie at Perkins restaurants (participating restaurants only), to get free maps at rest area’s, and to scrape ice off my windshield in the mornings. Yep. Being a Revo member has its perks. I’m using it tonight to bring you all a classic that I first saw in an elective class in high school back in 19-sumptin-sumptin. The class was titled “Futurism”. It was basically a language arts credit designed for retards so they may meet the requirements of graduation outlined by the Washington State Public School System. And hey, I passed that course with a Gentleman “C”.

I took this course in my Senior year, and truthfully, the only class I really applied myself to. I enjoyed it. The teacher did a pretty decent job of allowing me and other students to get a nice long hour nap so that we may be refreshed before lunch.

This movie, “The Time Machine” is an H.G Wells classic apparently. If you don’t know about it, it’s about a dude who invents a time machine that is run on solar and wind power. The setting is December 31st, 1899, in England I guess. It’s hard to tell really, because some of the characters have believable English accents, but the main character, (who I believe played Wilbur in the 50’s hit show, Mr Ed), sounded like Kevin Costner did in his version of Robin Hood.

My question though, is what three books would you bring back to a future to help them strive at civilization, if you knew the future people were educated like the students of Detoilet??

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GOP Debate Open Thread: Part….Again.

rebublican

Live! Only on CCCNBC.

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Brokeback Mountain II: Yogurt Love

What kind of grown man eats yogurt anyway? I’ve been noticing a lot of commercials recently with dudes eating yogurt. Have we seriously declined that far?

The facial expression of these “men” bothers me the most as they shove the yogurt filled spoon in their mouth. Good grief! This is the dawning of the age of Pajama Boy.

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How Morally Bankrupt Are Leftists?

Just ask Leftist Darling, Lena Dunham.

morallybankrupt

When it comes to defending abortion, there are few Planned Parenthood defenders who are more lewd and lascivious than Lena Dunham. The so-called comedian and celebrity spokeswoman for the abortion giant is doing her part to represent Planned Parenthood for Halloween as she plans to dress up as one of its abortionists for holiday.

Can you even begin to think of a more ghoulish, wretched, disgusting excuse for a human being than this filthy piece of shit?

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Leftist A-Hole Holds Back Election Results

Because it wasn’t “diverse” enough. Yea, it’s only a middle school student body election, but still.

When San Francisco middle school principal Lena Van Haren saw which kids on her campus had been elected to the student council, she was disturbed at the lack of diversity among the winners. There were no Latino or black candidates chosen for the top four spots.

Her concern for a representative student government, given the preponderance of students of color at Everett Middle School in the Mission District, may have been understandable. What she did about it, however, swiftly raised a different kind of alarm.

Van Haren decided to withhold the results of the Oct. 9 election for more than a week, saying the school community needed to figure out how to have a more representative government.

She must really think it unfair looking at the Democratic Presidential candidates.

More.

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Democrap Party Debate Open Thread

donkey

Hey! There’s a debate tonight. You may not have known because it’s during the 2015 Hip Hop Awards on MTV. You would think that the Demo”raps” would have planned the date better as to not leave their base to have to choose what to watch. No wonder they are expecting low ratings tonight for the debate.

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Your Recreation Is “Planned”…

20150729_roadtoserfdom17

District officials opted this year to employ a “recess consultant” to launch a pilot project at Concord and Normandale elementary schools designed to make students’ play time safer and “more inclusive,” KARE 11 reports.

“This is really about active play, it’s about being inclusive to all kids that we have from all the different cultures and backgrounds, so it’s about teaching kids the social skills to have healthy play,” Randal Smasal, the district’s director of teaching and learning, told the news site.

“The staff talk to the kids about what quality play looks like, how to be inclusive.”

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27 Ways To Be A Modern Pussy

brendan-fraser-bedazzled-dolphin-song

From the New York Slimes Men’s Style section, we read an article that tells all of you mouth breathing feebs out there 27 ways to be a modern man.

Being a modern man today is no different than it was a century ago. It’s all about adhering to principle. Sure, fashion, technology and architecture change over time, as do standards of etiquette, not to mention ways of carrying oneself in the public sphere. But the modern man will take the bits from the past that strike him as relevant and blend them with the stuff of today.

Some example from the list;

3. The modern man is considerate. At the movie theater, he won’t munch down a mouthful of popcorn during a quiet moment. He waits for some ruckus.

8. The modern man uses the proper names for things. For example, he’ll say “helicopter,” not “chopper” like some gauche simpleton.

20. On occasion, the modern man is the little spoon. Some nights, when he is feeling down or vulnerable, he needs an emotional and physical shield.

25. The modern man has no use for a gun. He doesn’t own one, and he never will.

26. The modern man cries. He cries often.

My list on becoming a modern man: 1. Don’t.

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Fish ON! Fish ON!

I remember catching my first fish, but it was unsuccessful. I learned that you don’t necessarily need to keep reeling it in all the way to the tip of the rod. Apparently, most fish can’t quite fit through the last eye of most rods. Being a novice fisherman fisherperson at the time, I didn’t understand that. I figured that if I kept reeling and reeling, the fish would slip through all of the eyes, down the rod, and into my hands. Nope. It doesn’t work that way. But I did discover how to take a hook out of a fishes mouth the easy way and relese it back into the wild.

I believe in catch and release.

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The Dog Train!

For what ever reason, this cracks me up. If I saw this out in my neighborhood, I would probably split a gut.

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Marco Rubio Has Nazi Themed Fund Raiser On Jewish Holiday

Ok. That’s not the headline, but it might as well be. Just look at this! From the Houston Chronicle: Marco Rubio’s Yom Kippur Fundraiser Held At Nazi Memorabilia Collector’s Mansion

Controversy erupted Tuesday over a presidential candidate’s fundraiser on holy Jewish holiday at a Texas mansion home to personal artifacts of Adolf Hitler.

Interest groups issued sharp statements over Republican Sen. Marco Rubio’s donor dinner at the Dallas-area mansion of real estate magnate Harlan Crow, whose eclectic art collection includes paintings by the Nazi fuhrer, a signed copy of his book and some place settings he once used, the Dallas Morning News reported.

By coincidence, the Tuesday fundraiser fell on Yom Kippur, Judaism’s holiest holiday.

Buried near the end of the article, we find this out:

“…Crow’s collection of artifacts is immense, including a garden full of statues of communist leaders he calls the “Garden of Evil.” He also has Dwight Eisenhower’s military helmet, a drinking mug of Paul Revere and the deed to George Washington’s Mount Vernon estate”

Perhaps we can say that Democrat Presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders aims to model our economic and political system after the Nazi’s because they were socialists after all.

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Your Potential Future President

A cracker? And he does it as often as possible because it makes him feel cleansed? Yet, he’s never asked God for forgiveness. If eating crackers makes him feel cleansed, imagine how cleansed he would feel if he had a dollop of cheez-whiz on it.

What a buffoon and an absolute phony.

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Oktoberfest Is An Intolerant And Anti-Islamic Event

Oktoberfest

It was only a matter of time before the “refugees” pouring into Europe and their sympathizers would begin to impose their Islamic will.

Morad Almuradi, writing from the Netherlands, has created a petition on Change.org asking that the city council of Munich, Germany end the traditional 16-day Oktoberfest event. He writes:

Dear City council of Munich,

I am writing this letter to bring to your attention something that I and many Muslims believe is unfair and requires attention.

I would like to inform you that the Oktoberfest is an Intolerant and Anti-Islamic event. We tried to ignore the event, but there too many Un-Islamic acts done at the Oktoberfest. Such as alcohol consumption, public nudity etc.

We understand that the Oktoberfest is a yearly German tradition, but we, Muslims, can not tolerate this Un-Islamic event, because it offends us and all Muslims on the earth.

We are requesting the immediate cancellation of the upcoming Oktoberfest event.

We also believe that the Oktoberfest might also offend all the Muslim refugees coming from Syria, Iraq, Afghanistan. The cancellation of the Oktoberfest event will help refugees not to forget their Islamic history. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Sincerely,
Morad Almuradi

The Oktoberfest days in Germany are numbered I’m afraid. Enjoy it while you can.

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GOP Debate Open Thread: Part Deux

rebublican

Feel free. Post your comments…for what it’s worth.

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Thursday Night Game Night

board-games

I’m thinking of a number. Let’s say…504. What is the significance of the number 504? An no, it is not Michael Moore’s body mass index, (although it could be, it’s not the answer I’m looking for). Take a guess and win a prize. All answers must be submitted before 12am CST. Good Luck!

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