What if you threw a party and nobody came? Would you feel bad? Alone? Rejected? Like nobody liked you and it wouldn’t matter if you fell off the Earth?

Well, that’s how hardcore moonbats are feeling right now. Since their heyday in 2005, they’ve had dwindling turnout at their increasingly freaky protests. Times are tough for folks who think papier-mâché images of Bush as a devil are the height of political expression. Despite having lots of money from George Soros and the love of Hollywood, the blame-America-first crowd doesn’t have much to show for itself except for a few preachy movies (The Kingdom, Lambs for Lions, In the Valley of Ellah, etc.). Worse, most of those movies have made less money than their porno knockoffs (The King’s Dom, Lambs on Lions, In Ellah’s Valley, etc.).

Most Americans remain proud of their country (or are newly proud, like Michelle Obama) and want our soldiers to stay in Iraq, kicking the hell out of the bad guys. Even the Democrat’s chosen candidate, Barrack “Jimmy Carter II” Obama, has been hedging on his stand to get all US troops out of the sandbox. 

It’s so bad for moonbats that even NPR, also known as America’s Pravda, has acknowledged improvement in Iraq. On Friday, they reported that many of our former enemies are calling it quits and even going so far as joining the winning team.

“Mullah Shakr al-Azzawi is another Sunni cleric who was part of the insurgency but now leads a local guard group funded by the U.S. Army. He says life for gunmen and their families was miserable because of constant pressure from U.S. and Iraqi forces.”

NPR piles on the bad news for moonbats.

“Mullah Shakr says that even so, he wouldn’t have turned himself in if it were not for his trust in American soldiers as fair intermediaries.”

Apparently, Mulla Shakr and thousands of others didn’t get the memo from liberals that US soldiers are nothing but murderous monsters and incarceration is worse than having your underwear pulled out through your nose. Maybe the fax machine was down.

Despite all this, leftists are a hardy bunch and never let unpleasant weather, a drop in popularity, or even reality get in their way of bashing America. User-friendly tools Amnesty International and the Torture Abolition and Survivor Support Coalition (TASSC? Well, at least the middle letters are correct) held a freak show in Washington D.C. over the weekend, illustrating just how badly the murderous jihadis have it in Guantanamo, complete with a complimentary prisoner.

Unfortunately, even after making the “cell” worse than it really is, it still appeared better than most college dorm rooms. As reported by the fine folks at This Ain’t Hell, the affair managed to draw only a handful of tourists, some of whom might have mistaken the cell as a port-a-potty or hunter education office.

For those who fear that continuing successes in Iraq and Afghanistan will dispirit these souls, remember that liberals, like most parasites and funguses, are a persistent bunch. They are already preparing for the DNC and RNC conventions, where they’ll do their best to make papier-mâché change the world. Thanks to them and their determination, we’ll never run out of hilarious nuggets like this (warning for language).

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