Mad Brad’s Movie Review – La La Land

The storyline takes place in Hollywood. It’s a movie about a Jewish pianist who drives a really cool ’83ish Buick Convertible who falls in love with a malnourished Space Alien. I fear for his life throughout the movie. At any moment I expect her to go full Space Alien and rip out his rectum through his mouth. He does finally escape though.

Don’t watch it. I know it won awards. Don’t let that fool you. At first you think that maybe Hollywood was trying to make an old school musical. There was dirty dancing on the freeway in the opening scene. Then you see this movie for what it really is. It’s a Sci-Fi Drama. There’s some good music but at any moment you expect a giant serpent to launch out of the mouth of the leading lady and strangle the leading man. I was expecting a kill throughout the movie.

Don’t watch it.

 

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7 Responses to Mad Brad’s Movie Review – La La Land

  1. Bman says:

    Shit…good enough for me. I can guaren-fricken-tee you that I wont watch this movie. From your review, I can tell it’s a total shitbomb. As we all know, I like to critique cinema and stage plays.

    • MadBrad says:

      You are exactly who I was thinking of as the movie got started. This is a movie that uses stage actors and actresses exclusively. It looked like a musical pretty much at first and you start thinking that finally Hollywood is trying to do something really classy and classical for a change. They were really trying to do something original and different, something they haven’t done in a long, long time.

      Then you find that you can’t get past the size of the eyeballs on the leading lady. You realize that her eyeballs are easily as big around as her mouth. At one point I had to pause the DVD when she was singing and had her mouth wide open and I realized that her mouth wide open was the same size as one of her ocular orbital recesses in her skull and I knew she was not of this world. I could not get past the fact that she is not of this world, maybe even not of this galaxy. It was hard to take the plot seriously when they throw in a Space Alien.

      This movie is so weird that you may actually have to see it for yourself.

      • R.D. Walker says:

        I don’t intend to watch the movie but please tell me you aren’t disparaging the appearance of super, smokin’, blazin’ hot Emma Stone.

  2. FrankinTexas says:

    Is there anything that is more over hyped and that under delivers than the political propaganda that is flushed out of the toilet that is Hollywood? If you like wasting money you might as well just burn the cash you were going to spend on the movies, you will get more return on your money that way.

  3. notamobster says:

    I have a weakness for good movies. Fortunately, there aren’t very many of those, lately.

    I mostly just watch sci-fi and war movies, these days. Last good one I watched was “Passengers”. It was an interesting movie, if you like the idea of life without other people around…

  4. MadBrad says:

    Later this afternoon I will be able to get back to watching what was deemed un-viewable last night, which lead to the La La Land selection.

    It is Sun Tzu, The Art of War.