Not to put too fine a point on it, but you are fucked.
Of course, thanks to the election of Obama, all of us in America are fucked, but you guys are royally fucked. While we will suffer four years of the flu, Israel will have 4 years of the plague.
Here’s my advice.
Do not expect help from Obama. The man can’t even stand up to Fox News, let alone someone intent on genocide. Even if he could, he won’t for you. Remember, this is the guy who toasted people who want to kill you. If Israel is attacked, the best you can expect is a strongly worded letter to the UN, along with a letter to your ambassador complaining that the ashes that used to be Israel’s citizens are contributing to global warming.
It’s time to cowboy the fuck up. The IDF needs to be brought back into shape. It has to be a major military force capable of slugging it out with all the Arab militaries in the neighborhood and coming out not just on top, but on top of their piled, oozing corpses. And trading land for peace? That’s the metrosexual approach to diplomacy. The only time land can be traded for peace is when that land is a clear killing field. Think more like 1973 and less like 2006.
Get your house in order. The roster of recent Israeli leaders is less than inspiring. Many of them are limp dicks who have just put in their time or made deals with the devil for the office. Take it from someone who’s now paying the price of electing adolescents to do the job of adults. You don’t want a philosophically incontinent hand-wringer in charge when the shit hits the fan. Sure, it’s kind of hypocritical of me to say this when we just elected a half-assed half-wit as President, but we are likely to survive four years of this—you aren’t.
Remember that next to nobody in the international community is going to like you no matter what, so fuck’em. Wear the black hat and do what has to be done. Yeah, lots of Europeans complained in 2006 when the IDF turned southern Beirut into a used concrete sales lot, but those people are a living reminder that it wasn’t Arabs who made the ovens. If you want to compete in the arena of public opinion, develop a world-class media and delivery system to go along with it. Otherwise, stick to what you do well, which is blowing the shit out of bad guys and then looking at the camera with a “What, me worry?” kind of grin.
Cultivate the enemies of your enemies. Sure, there are lots of folks that want to bake you like a Christmas goose. Fortunately for you, these experienced haters also hold dim opinions of their neighbors. The Sunni/Shiite division is real and the current incarnation of it involves Sunni (non nuke holders) and Shiite (wannabe nuke holders). I’m not suggesting handing over Israel’s nuclear secrets to every smiling Arab you meet, but if the Saudi’s hint that they’d like the coordinates to Ahmadinejad’s hot tub, pass it on.
Expect trouble. There is a slim chance that the next four years may pass like a tranquil breeze thanks to the charm and power of Obama’s personality. On the other hand, it’s much more likely that the next four years will be as gentle as a meth-fueled, sex-starved orangutan. You can’t afford to fuck around. The wolf is not only at your door, he’s in your house, has used your ATM Card, and is sprinkling meat tenderizer in your underwear. Yeah, that movement of Syrian tanks on the border with Lebanon may be for the stated peaceful purpose of “stopping smugglers,” but let it be known that you’re pretty sure smugglers rarely traverse radioactive plains studded with melted slag, too. Sure, the world will think you’re paranoid, but you have to be alive to be paranoid.
I hope that in a few years we’ll once again have a leadership capable to standing up to evil men instead of blather on about “change” and other buzzwords. Until then, you’re on your own. Good luck.
You’re going to need it.Share