It is necessary that the pigs get the apples…

See, they are brainworkers.

The mystery of where the milk went to was soon cleared up. It was mixed every day into the pigs’ mash. The early apples were now ripening, and the grass of the orchard was littered with windfalls. The animals had assumed as a matter of course that these would be shared out equally; one day, however, the order went forth that all the windfalls were to be collected and brought to the harness-room for the use of the pigs. At this some of the other animals murmured, but it was no use. All the pigs were in full agreement on this point, even Snowball and Napoleon. Squealer was sent to make the necessary explanations to the others.

“Comrades!” he cried. “You do not imagine, I hope, that we pigs are doing this in a spirit of selfishness and privilege? Many of us actually dislike milk and apples. I dislike them myself. Our sole object in taking these things is to preserve our health. Milk and apples (this has been proved by Science, comrades) contain substances absolutely necessary to the well-being of a pig. We pigs are brainworkers. The whole management and organisation of this farm depend on us. Day and night we are watching over your welfare. It is for YOUR sake that we drink that milk and eat those apples. Do you know what would happen if we pigs failed in our duty? Jones would come back! Yes, Jones would come back! Surely, comrades,” cried Squealer almost pleadingly, skipping from side to side and whisking his tail, “surely there is no one among you who wants to see Jones come back?”

The pigs weren’t being selfish. They had to have the apples. It was necessary for the well being of the farm.

Speaking of the necessity of apples for pigs as it pertains to the well being of the farm…

House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) said Thursday that she opposes a cut in congressional pay because it would diminish the dignity of lawmakers’ jobs.

“I don’t think we should do it; I think we should respect the work we do,” Pelosi told reporters in the Capitol. “I think it’s necessary for us to have the dignity of the job that we have rewarded.”

See? It is necessary for the republic that our betters be rewarded. Not because they want to be rewarded. Hell, some pigs don’t like apples and milk. No, it is necessary for the well being of the farm nation that they be rewarded. Surely, comrades, there is no one among you who wants to see Jones the recession come back?

Do you understand better now?

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5 Responses to It is necessary that the pigs get the apples…

  1. BigJimTX says:

    Now that they are sufficiently fattened, there is only one thing left to do…

  2. fasttimes says:

    Bravo, RD.

    • R.D. Walker says:

      “Now if there was one thing that the animals were completely certain of, it was that they did not want Jones back. When it was put to them in this light, they had no more to say. The importance of keeping the pigs in good health was all too obvious. So it was agreed without further argument that the milk and the windfall apples (and also the main crop of apples when they ripened) should be reserved for the pigs alone.”

  3. messup says:

    O.K.! Let’s objectively review Washington DC’s claim to “doing the People’s business!!!” Their excuse for justifying a $174,000 dollar per year salary (plus perks, junkets, “Gold Plated”health insurance et al – you get the picture). “The Have’s” make $113.31/hour vs. “The Have Nots” make $27.04/hour!!!!
    Every average “working” American has 2,082 hours, on average, “at work” hours.
    1)There are some 47 different holidays, excuses for holidays etc. at National, State, Municipal and Local levels. Holidays (some 13/year) = 13daysx2 weekdays offx8= 208 hours off from work.
    2)Then there are “sick leaves” for one reason or other. Some 12sickdays /year= 12×8= 96 hours off from work
    3)We pile on this record at least one weeks vacation. Some 5 days x 8 hours = 40 hours off from work
    4) We The Elite People of Washington DC get at least two recesses off per year. 2 recesses of two weeks = 2x5daysx8hours=80 hours off of work from “doin’ the peoples business”
    5) Most “We The Elite People of culture of corruption in Washington DC” take a “junket” or two per year. One “junket” for one week = 5 days x8=40 hours off of work.
    6) Most We The Elite People in Washington DC have to visit their “home State’s Districts” for campaign purposes. One week = 5 daysx 8 hours = 40 hours off of work
    7) Most We The Elite People in Washington DC visit “renewable energy sites, etc. etc. etc.” Another week away from doin’ The People’s Work = 5daysx8 =40 hours off of work.
    Sum total of hours every American “average worker” works in america = 2,082 (less holidays=208, sick leave=96, vacations=40 and “other”) Total hours every average american works every year in these USA= 2,082-344=1,738 working hours every single year. If Average American salaries are $47,000/year, this equals an hourly salary of $27.04.
    How’s “We The Elite People” doin’? Well, 2082 hours per year less Holidays=208 hours, less sick leave = 96 hours, less vacations=40 hours, less Recesses=80 hours, less Junkets= 40 hours. less “electioneering”=40 hours, less “business visits”=40 hours…equals 2,082 hours available for work less 344 hours off of work PLUS “extras” of 200 hours is a sum total of 1,538 hours per year each and every one of Washington DC’s Elite People of culture of corruption ACTUALLY WORK per year. Now, $174,000/1,538 = $113.13 PER HOUR , folks. If this doesn’t frost ones b*lls there isn’t any telling what will.
    Compare: American’s average hourly salary of ONLY $27.04 vs. We The Elite People of culture of corruption in Washington DC’s average hourly salary of $113.13 (this doesn’t include, body guards, limo service, career flights, golden parachutes, health insurance policies, insider trading stock options, et al).NAH! cut this crap out, period! Damn! Cut US House’s and Senates salaries NOW! Cut their staff’s and their salaries, NOW!Pray.Amen.

  4. DocO says:


    I love the Animal Farm comparison. Very apropos.

    Animal Farm, Brave New World, Lord of the Flies and 1984 should all be required reading IMHO to offer some literary introduction to Distopian concepts.