Off Topic

This off topic thread brought to you by your mom and dad who were actually pretty fun and cool before you showed up and put an end to the party.

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64 Responses to Off Topic

  1. Locke n Load says:

    Ahh fuck.
    3 18 hr days.
    2 Four Lokos.
    1 seriously beleaguered Revoista….
    sometimes I really envy your sedentary ways. Ok, and your normal multi-generational photography. Damnit, I want a normal life…..

  2. notamobster says:

    I drank one of those four lokos for you on election night. Tastes like watered-down cough syrup, but it kicks like an angry mule!

  3. notamobster says:

    Kid Rocks new video “Born Free” was shot almost entirely in the town which will forever be my home!

    Munising, Mi.

    (It sounds very Bob Seger-ish… Seger’s “greatest hits” album cover was shot in the same town.)

  4. slaphappypap says:

    I must apologize to everyone here. I haven’t been commenting here lately because my laptop charger took a crap. Blogging on this crackberry is like milking an ant.

  5. R.D. Walker says:

    “Blogging on this crackberry is like milking an ant.”

    I have been on the road a lot lately and some of my posts have been from my Android device. I know what you mean Sorta and you can consider that line about milking an ant stolen.

    If my posts sometimes have more typos than usual, it is because I am milking a god damned ant.

  6. notamobster says:

    I correct em when I see em. Keep milking, buddy. That was slaphappypap by the way. Don’t use a magnifying glass, ants can burn under those.

  7. R.D. Walker says:

    The greatest showman of our era performs…

  8. Charlottean says:

    nota: Didn’t know you were a Yooper! I’m soon to be going back myself. Not native born but my heart is still there.

  9. notamobster says:

    I wasn’t native born either. My heart will always reside in Munising. Gitche Gumee and Munissi. Ojibway for big lake and place by the island. Munising, Mi. I attended high school and entered the service from Munising. “______ is where the heart is.”

    Where’s your heart trapped in the UP? Where’s your butt trapped, now? I’m a troll at the moment, but I can dream…. I’m just glad to be out of that god-awful heat! 14 years is enough for a lifetime… all over the damned globe….f-king hot!

  10. notamobster says:

    President George W Bush is in a clip at the link below, acting like a statesman. I wonder if zero will be the same way in 2 years? NO! He’ll go to his deathbed blaming Bush.

    Bush is Presidential (and I wasn’t even a fan of him)

    http://www.therightscoop.com/video-bush-obama-doesnt-need-me-criticizing-him

  11. Charlottean says:

    Serious question: Why does the U.S. have a debt ceiling?

    “Congress has never failed to increase the debt limit when necessary, and we are confident Congress will act in 2011 to ensure that the full faith and credit
    of the United States is protected,” Treasury Department spokesman Steven Adamske said.

  12. Charlottean says:

    Okay, never mind. Even no answer is an answer. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not criticizing anyone here. It just confirms my notion that it is another ”feel-good” limit to appease those who feel there should be some restraint exercised by government. Thank you.

    @nota: Started my family in the UP in the early 80′s. Was rejected by their mother and had to leave but I planted a daughter and three sons in the best grounding know to modern man. I’m getting pretty close to retirement but want to start winding down a little early. The kids want me to return and share their lives with them and their kids. Gonna do it!

    As my moniker declares, I’m biding my time in Charlotte, NC for now. I like it here but family has a far better draw. I, like L&L drive truck. Only the last eight years and as much as it’s a opportunity to see the U.S. I’d like to see the kids now.

  13. notamobster says:

    Sweet. Where at in the UP?

    When you move, you’ll pass right by me. You should stop on your way through for a beer or coffee…

  14. R.D. Walker says:

    Charlottean: I thought it was a rhetorical question. As in: “Why the hell do we have a debt ceiling if we raise it every time we approach it?” I didn’t think you expected an answer.

    The answer is that a previous congress put it in place and subsequent congresses have overridden it. There is no sense to it.

  15. Locke n Load says:

    I had NO idea you drove a truck!
    Wow. I’ll be hauling Christmas trees out your way in a few weeks.

  16. Charlottean says:

    You’re right RD. It does reek of rhetorical. I was just holding out that there really was a valid reason for it. Naahhh.. Smoke and mirrors.

    Daughter in the Soo. The boys hover around Naubinway, Engadine and Curtis. My oldest boy is trying out his hand at commercial fishing out of Naubinway (Yes they have their cards) once this economy busted his construction business here in Charlotte. I’m just a little bit behind in following them back North.

  17. Charlottean says:

    Still waiting for the right time. Will get in touch when I know. Love to stop by.

    Hauling scrap metal between Charlotte and Chicago. Make the trip about once a week. Less often if I’m lucky. (sorry slap*, never liked the big cities)

    Foreclosing on this house. So my timeline will depend on how long that takes. Until then, I suppose all I can do is take advantage of it. Not my style but what ya gonna do.

  18. Charlottean says:

    Wanted to pass this along. Awesome!

    CLICK BELOW– THIS WILL BLOW YOUR MIND, NONE OF THE CARS YOU WILL SEE IN THIS SLIDE SHOW ARE REAL–THEY ARE ALL LITTLE MODEL CARS. TRY TO REMEMBER THAT WHEN YOU ARE WATCHING THIS. THIS GUY IS A GENUIS.

  19. slaphappypap says:

    None taken Char. I grew up in a small neighborhood outside the city and in it. Most of the city is made up of small different neighborhoods. The city is crappy due to the consistent liberal policies. And the relaxed laws on repeat offenders of drug charges. And corruption. I could go on…This blackberry is going to be the death of my eyes and my fat thumbs.

  20. R.D. Walker says:

    Okay, Revoistas. I am going to be in traveling on business through Thursday. Real belly-of-the-beast stuff, let me tell you. I’d love to give details but, as Bush 41 says: “Wouldn’t be prudent.”

    I will be armed with my laptop but will be out of pocket for most of the daytime hours. This is where I used to say “posting may be light” but the way this blog rocks nowadays, I don’t think that applies. That is a very good thing.

  21. Locke n Load says:

    Good luck RD, give em hell. Or cupcakes, whatever is more appropriate at the time :)

  22. R.D. Walker says:

    You can’t tell the economy sucks by traveling through O’hare.

    This place is packed.

  23. slaphappypap says:

    The economy doesn’t include slap today. Laying on the couch with the flu. I feel like I got hit by a truck.

  24. Bman says:

    The comment above the photo of the cool mom and dad reminded me of something-

    Rule #7- Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent’s generation, try delousing your closet in your own room.

    — Bill Gates’ High School Graduation Address

  25. vanagram says:

    A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

    The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, “If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?”

    Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, “Sure, Why not?”

    The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASApage on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

    The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany .

    Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

    Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, “You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.”

    “That’s right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,” says Bud.

    He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

    Then Bud says to the young man, “Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?”

    The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, “Okay, why not?”

    “You’re an aide in the Obama Administration”, says Bud.

    “Wow! That’s correct,” says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?”

    “No guessing required.” answered the cowboy. “You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don’t know a thing about how working people make a living – or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. …

    Now give me back my dog.

  26. R.D. Walker says:

    That joke is soooooo relevant to me right now.

  27. vanagram says:

    Back Channel Update:

    Breaking News from the Front….

    RD is in a whore house or something….or is whoring around in somebody’s house….or being ministered to by a reformed whore…I can’t keep it all straight.

  28. RJM says:

    Spock in a house of ill repute…does not compute! He’s more likely locked himself in a small basement room in the Library of Congress reading the fine print of the Bamster’s White House records to illuminate us.

  29. R.D. Walker says:

    I am in the belly of the beast. You figure it out.

  30. slinger says:

    He’s in a submarine about 35 miles off the coast of California?

  31. notamobster says:

    Yeah slinger, that would be right next to the asshole of the beast.

    ______________________________

    Belly of the beast? You’re in Rosie O Donnell’s abdominal cavity? First time a man’s been in there.

  32. Locke n Load says:

    hows the weather in DC?

  33. R.D. Walker says:

    Locke… ;-)

  34. vanagram says:

    ‎1.Go to Google maps.
    2. Go to “Get Directions.”
    3. Type “Japan” as the start
    location.
    4. Type “China” as the end location.
    5. Go to direction #43.

    WTF?

  35. Bman says:

    Weird Van. I noticed though, if you would take a right instead of a left on direction #34, it could shave off about 4 minutes of time to get there.

  36. R.D. Walker says:

    New experience today Revoistas. As I passed through airport security, the TSA agent who waved me through was a Muslim woman in a hajib.

  37. notamobster says:

    Don’t get me f-king started, Sir!

  38. Bman says:

    The TSA agent probably get a good stoning from her husband every night she goes home for patting down a man who is not related to her. A big no no in muslim cultures.

  39. MadBrad says:

    Did she avert her eyes when you walked through the body scanner or did she close her eyes as she fondled your junk?

  40. notamobster says:

    Brad: Smiley

  41. R.D. Walker says:

    She was on admin duty and just waving people through the metal detector. I offered up my junk for fondling, but after a moment’s hesittation, she declined.

    Later, I saw woman in full Afghanistan burka in the airport. She looked like a fatty. I hope it wasn’t a suicide vest.

    Gotta go. Flight attendant just gave me the stink eye.

  42. notamobster says:

    Allen West’s chief of staff called Nancy P “garbage”!

    (The Hill)- A newly named GOP chief of staff called the outgoing Democratic majority — and in particular Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) — “garbage.”

    Joyce Kaufman, the incoming chief of staff to Rep.-elect Allen West (R-Fla.), said: “Over these months I have been blessed to form very wonderful relationships with the West family. I looked at this family and [told] myself, ‘How do you not fight and put them up on the pedestal when we’ve got this garbage up on the pedestal now, people like Nancy Pelosi?’ “

    Kaufman, a conservative South Florida radio personality, made the comments on her show Tuesday.

  43. notamobster says:

    Media Matters (dot org) is attempting to destroy Beck by calling him an anti-semite, and tongue-slathering Soros’ ballsack.

    They are resorting to their usual, factless emotional pleas. They are also airing the whole episodes of his series! (these people are retards)

    Their entire argument against what he is saying boils down to this:

    Racist! Hitler! Racist! Nuh-aw! Racist!

  44. vanagram says:

    This is reason #497 that every homeowner should own a gun. And perhaps a mouse trap.

    http://www.wistv.com/global/story.asp?s=13465624

  45. Bman says:

    I hope the mouse was OK…

  46. Kenneth says:

    They can try to destroy Beck, but it only makes him more powerful. I actually stopped paying attention to him for a while, but they kept attacking him and trying to bring him down. He kept going. I then became interested again. I don’t know what it was, but when people attack him, I have to stand by my fellow conservatives.

  47. sortahwitte says:

    Van,

    I think they should also charge him with mouse endangerment. I doubt if Mickey was consulted before the application of vegetable oil.

  48. vanagram says:

    American flags on the bicycles of elementary school kids now lead to ‘racial tensions’; flags banned of course.

    http://www.fox40.com/news/headlines/ktxl-americanflagbike11122010,0,3045879.htmlstory

  49. Uke says:

    Van, that is outrageous on so many levels. I tell ya, I admire the kid’s calm. I would be absolutely furious.

    As I was when my 5th grade teacher tried to instruct me that Ukraine isn’t a real country, that it was actually Russia and that I was lying to the class in claiming that Ukraine existed.

    This was in 1993, BTW.

    Let’s put it this way… I did not remain so calm and cooperating. Neither did my parents.

  50. Locke n Load says:

    damn RD, hope yer back home. be a shame if u were missing such a beautiful fall day in Iowa…

  51. sortahwitte says:

    RD, excellent pix. Oklahoma has been seeing an increase in earthquakes. It’s probably all our veterans spinning. What a revolting development.

  52. notamobster says:

    San Fransicko Nanny-Staters want you to keep your foreskin, by force of law!

    The Board of Supervisors just banned toys in Happy Meals, which drew worldwide attention.

    Now the latest ban being proposed in San Francisco is on male circumcision.

    A proposed ballot measure for the November 2011 ballot – when voters will be electing the San Francisco’s next mayor – would amend The City’s police code “to make it a misdemeanor to circumcise, excise, cut or mutilate the foreskin, testicle or penis of another person who has not attained the age of 18.”

    Doing so would result in a fine of up to $1,000 and up to one year in jail, according to the proposed measure submitted to the Department of Elections.

  53. notamobster says:

    I decided to “Double Down” finally, at KFC. I must say that this sandwich, while seemingly over-the-top, is absolutely INCREDIBLE!

  54. sortahwitte says:

    I thought a comment was in order for msnbc’s new slogan: lean forward. I’m sure all 16 of their viewers are in lockstep with that thought. However, I was taught to never touch the wall above the urinal as it was probably ‘nasty’. At ease.

  55. Slaphappypap says:

    That sandwich looks like hell. Does it come with a free toy?

  56. Locke n Load says:

    I have GOT to try that sandwich. damn…

    BTW, My rocket scientist friend got back to me. I’ve posed a few questions to her, waiting for her response.