Off Topic

This Off Topic thread brought to you by death defying, justicular wing suit base jumping in Norway.

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90 Responses to Off Topic

  1. notamobster says:

    Just got done hanging up my doe. I took her with a 320yd shot from my Remington 700 30-06 / 3-12x40mm Cabela’s Guide Pro scope.

    Missed on the first shot. Doped it and hit her square in the ass. Got her home, sprayed her cavity out and removed the inner loins.

    Mrs Nota just made homemade bread, so I toasted some – fried the loins (medallioned) in butter, white onions, with a dusting of my special blend [salt, pepper, garlic, cayenne]. Topped with a slice of cheese and had the tastiest philly steak ever!

    (And no, this doesn’t violate the man code rules, because I killed it myself) ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. notamobster says:

    I hung her from the kids playground.

  3. MadBrad says:

    Vintage find.

    I have pods of junk in various rooms of my house that act as time capsules. Things are in boxes where they don’t belong and every few years I clean things up and move them somewhere else. Today while rearranging chairs on the deck of the Titanic I found several VHS tapes bearing my handwriting on labels entitled “CNN News coverage Gulf War”. Endless hours of air strikes and cruise missile attacks being explained, along with images of the latest and greatest stealth technology. It was all pretty amazing stuff during its time.

  4. Jim22 says:

    All American men like explosions.

    Save them, Brad.

    they are memories of good times.

  5. R.D. Walker says:

    Anybody care to recommend a new rifle scope for my M1A? Looking for something no more than $500. No less than 40mm objective diameter (50mm is better). Adjustable magnification out to 10x at least. Doesn’t have to be mildot.

  6. notamobster says:

    {{Slightly}} over your limit…

    Great scope…

  7. Jim22 says:

    Back on the dark side as of yesterday. No problems at all.

  8. Jim22 says:

    Just what is a swordfish slider? Is it anything like a White Castle slider?

  9. sortahwitte says:

    Hey. To all you that see an uncertain future in our beloved country.

    Over at today, there are links to making penicillin and insulin.

    I know, but when it gets down to it, I won’t watch people die if there’s any other chance.

  10. Jim22 says:

    Re the wingsuit video: what is the purpose of tricks like that? It seems to be to go as long as you can on adrenalin highs until you kill yourself.

    Anybody understand it?

  11. Bman says:

    I don’t know Jim…I understand it, but I sure as shit wouldn’t attempt it. Heck, i’ve never even been on a snowmobile. Just not interested, but then again, I’m not an adrenalin junkie. A rollercoaster has the same effect on me as a wingsuit has on thrill seeker.

    By the way…how does one practice flying a wingsuit? If you screw up once, youre toast.

  12. R.D. Walker says:

    I have jumped from an aircraft in flight at 800′ and 15,000′. I have dived in the ocean down to 146′ below the surface. I have climbed an 800′ sheer rock wall. I have flown in a helicopter into a war zone. I have parachuted into the jungle at night in a foreign land. I have hiked alone in the wilderness for days on end. All I can tell you is that it feels good to push the envelope.

  13. BrunDawg says:

    I have driven 68 mph in a 65 zone.

  14. R.D. Walker says:

    Iowa Couple, Married 72 Years, Die a Day Apart

    FONTANELLE, Iowa (AP) โ€” The daughter of a Fontanelle couple who had been married 72 years says her parents died a day apart from injuries they suffered in a collision last month.

    Patty Queck said Thursday that her parents, 92-year-old Virgil Martin and his wife, 89-year-old Evelyn, had been severely injured in the Nov. 22 collision. Queck says her mother died on Monday at a hospice, her father on Tuesday.

    Cass County authorities say the Martins were driving east three miles south of Anita around 3:45 p.m. on Nov. 22 when their car collided with a sport utility vehicle driven by 33-year-old Cynthia Simon, of Anita.

    Simon also was injured and taken to Cass County Memorial Hospital in Atlantic.

    Sheriff Darby McLaren says misdemeanor charges against Simon are pending.

  15. jacksonsdad says:

    Dunno if this has been posted here before but worth repeating….

  16. jacksonsdad says:

    And my wifes all time favorite…

  17. jacksonsdad says:

    Sorry… it’s this one…

  18. notamobster says:

    I agree with RD.

    I’ve hiked in the wilderness of foreign lands. I’ve had to SURVIVE in the wilderness and the city.

    I’ve kicked in doors on dope dealers & murderers. I’ve been in many a fight on the street. Many civilian, many police work.

    I’ve driven way too fast, and been way too stupid.

    The envelope loves to be pushed and pushing it is fun.

  19. R.D. Walker says:

    Ah, the conveniences of modern life…

  20. Bman says:

    Dammit! Nothing is real.

  21. R.D. Walker says:

    I have been sick as a dog since last night. Fever, chills, headache , body aches, this sucks hard. It felt like the small of my back was in a vice. This is the sickest I have been in years. I might be out another day.

  22. Locke n Load says:

    Count your blessings. At leaast you don’t have to drive 700 miles while feeling like that ๐Ÿ˜‰ I used to think schools were the worst petri dishes on earth but am coming to believe truck stops might be as bad.
    Theres a reason we always look like shit.
    Get better man, get some sleep. Hopefully you won’t graduate to the heaves.

  23. BrunDawg says:

    If you are a big fan of “Guy on a Buffalo” like I am then episode 2 is must see youtube.
    I especial-like the cactus punch kitty in the face.

    Get Well RD.

  24. sortahwitte says:

    RD. Low profile. Stay warm. Hot toddies. I don’t know how cold it is out your front door. Mine, however, is below freezing and the north wind is blowing 40mph. I changed back into my flannel jammies. Hope you’re better soon.

  25. Jim22 says:

    Lots of liquid, vitamin C, sleep, and aspirin. Then it just takes time.

    Hope you’re on the mend.

  26. Jim22 says:

    There are two statues in a park; One of a nude man and one of a nude woman. They had been facing each other across a pathway for a hundred years, when one day an angel comes down from the sky and, with a single gesture, brings the two to life!!!!!!!!

    The angel tells them, ‘As a reward for being so patient through a hundred blazing summers and dismal winters, you have been given life for thirty minutes to do what you’ve wished to do the most.’

    He looks at her, she looks at him, and they go running behind the shrubbery.

    The angel waits patiently as the bushes rustle and giggling ensues.

    After fifteen minutes, the two return, out of breath and laughing. The angel tells them, ‘Um, you have fifteen minutes left, would you care to do it again?’

    He asks her ‘Shall we?’

    She eagerly replies, ‘Oh, yes, let’s! But let’s change positions….This time, I’ll hold the pigeon down and you crap on its head.’

  27. Locke n Load says:

    Sorry for the absence. Won’t bore you with the details. Been a tough couple weekds.

  28. jacksonsdad says:

    Saw this today. Even more pertinent now than it was when it was filmed…

  29. jacksonsdad says:

    How long before someone makes a commercial (or web video.. hint hint) featuring this Congressional Scholar making an incredibly compelling (and IMO indisputable) case that the Obamacare mandate is absolutely positively NOT a tax?

    It’s one of the only things I’ve actually agreed with him on. It should definitely be broadcast again and again… enough times to ensure that even the most cloistered SCOTUS member see’s it and is likewise influenced by it.

    I mean, Barry really knocked it outta da park! What a superior legal mind he was blessed with! How could anyone possibly disagree with his position?

    I like this one too…

  30. R.D. Walker says:

    Today is the Feast of the Inarticulate Conception. To celebrate, I am doing the prep for a colonoscopy tomorrow. I just started. Wish me luck.

  31. Jim22 says:

    What was it that Dave Barry said about preparing for a colonoscopy? Oh, yeah, “There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt.”

  32. jacksonsdad says:

    Never understood the thinking behind the name “Golytely”.

    ‘Goheavily’ would be more apt but… if you wanted to be truly descriptive it would have to be something like ‘Gofrequently’ or ‘Goprolifically’ or (my personal favorite) ‘Gothoroughly’.

    My heart goes out to you RD as well as positive vibes that all is well in the land down under.

  33. R.D. Walker says:

    MoviPrep should be controlled under the Geneva Convention as a chemical weapon.

  34. MadBrad says:

    The Horror… The Horror.

    Good Luck!

    Damn, my day is coming soon.

  35. Locke n Load says:

    Just think of all the time and money yer saving using MoviPrep instead of ColonCleanse ColonBlow or whatever the latest ‘diet’ cleanse is called ๐Ÿ™‚

    God how I miss Phil Hartman….

  36. R.D. Walker says:

    This isn’t a fun evening.

  37. Locke n Load says:

    Ah yes, but be grateful you have a Droid to entertain yourself in isolation. I’m assuming you’re isolated, lmao. Can’t imagine anyone in the house but your boy would find humor in this ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Wait, on second thought.. my wife laughed her ass off at my first prostate exam

  38. jacksonsdad says:

    Just got this via e-mail….

    The Green Thing

    Checking out at the store, the young cashier suggested to the older woman that she
    should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren’t good for the
    The woman apologized and explained, “We didn’t have this green thing back in my earlier

    The clerk responded, “That’s our problem today. Your generation did not care enough
    to save our environment for future generations.”

    She was right — our generation didn’t have the green thing in its day.

    Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. The
    store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could
    use the same bottles over and over. So they really were recycled. But we didn’t have
    the green thing back in our day.

    We walked up stairs, because we didn’t have an escalator in every store and office
    building. We walked to the grocery store and didn’t climb into a 300-horsepower machine
    every time we had to go two blocks. But she was right. We didn’t have the green thing
    in our day.

    Back then, we washed the baby’s diapers because we didn’t have the throw-away kind.
    We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy gobbling machine burning up 220 volts —
    wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids got
    hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing. But
    that young lady is right. We didn’t have the green thing back in our day.

    Back then, we had one TV, or radio, in the house — not a TV in every room. And the
    TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief (remember them?), not a screen the
    size of the state of Montana. In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we
    didn’t have electric machines to do everything for us. When we packaged a fragile item
    to send in the mail, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not Styrofoam or
    plastic bubble wrap. Back then, we didn’t fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to
    cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so
    we didn’t need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity.
    But she’s right. We didn’t have the green thing back then.

    We drank from a fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic
    bottle every time we had a drink of water. We refilled writing pens with ink instead of
    buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away
    the whole razor just because the blade got dull. But we didn’t have the green thing
    back then.

    Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus, and kids rode their bikes to school or
    walked instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service. We had one electrical
    outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And we
    didn’t need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 2,000
    miles out in space in order to find the nearest pizza joint.

    But isn’t it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just
    because we didn’t have the green thing back then?

    Please forward this on to another selfish old person who needs a lesson in
    conservation from a smartass young person.

    Remember: Don’t make old people mad.
    We don’t like being old in the first place, so it doesn’t take much to piss us off.

  39. Locke n Load says:

    JD, that put a huge smile on my face ๐Ÿ™‚

  40. jacksonsdad says:

    I shouldn’t talk because I was lucky enough that during my childhood I got everything I needed and lotsa things that I wanted. My mom came up in the environment described in that e-mail and her work ethic is, to this very day, impeccable. She’s 26 years older than me and I have a hard time keeping up with her. She’s never known anything but hard work and she’s a better person inside and out because of it.

    My step dad was several years older than my mother and that SOB was the hardest working MFer I have ever known. Not just ‘biznez’ work, although he worked 6 days a week servicing what he sold, but ‘homework’ too as he always worked outside till sundown AFTER her got home (not to mention ALL weekend too) and I never once heard him complain.

    He served in WWII and he always had a prolific garden .. the fruits (and vegetables) of which he mostly gave away to his disabled vet buddies. He worked his ass off till the week he died and his old man did the same thing. I am honored to be his son and I’ll consider my life a resounding success if I turn out half the man he was.

    These whiney pukes we’re forced to endure today would make him puke. Literally. Shame on us for allowing this state of affairs to come to pass. My old man educated himself by lamp-light. He walked to school every day with no shoes (and uphill both ways).

    Seriously though… shame on us. The best thing we can do for these fucken whiney pukes is put a man-sized yoke on their backs and let them feel the weight. Of course, a swift kick in the teeth might be appropriate for the obstinate.

  41. Tn-Cat says:

    So true JD. Great post.

  42. BrunDawg says:

    Video proof that gun-free zones are safe environments;

  43. R.D. Walker says:

    All is well in the land down under. I had a bit of scare on my last scope three years ago but all is well now and I am officially on the five year plan. Good to get that behind me.

  44. jacksonsdad says:


    heh heh

  45. jacksonsdad says:

    Glad to hear it RD! Hope you and the rest of the Revoistas have a great weekend!

  46. Bman says:

    How old should one be to have that done? I haven’t been to the doctor since I was 16 when I needed a physical to tryout for my high school golf team.

  47. R.D. Walker says:

    They say 50. My younger brother had other issues and had it done much younger and discovered polyps. Since he had them, I had it done. Yep. I had ’em too. None this time however. ๐Ÿ™‚

  48. Bman says:

    Good to know. However, under Obamacare, they aren’t going to recommend this until the age of 95. Guess I wont be looking forward to that procedure for a very long time.

  49. sortahwitte says:

    Under obamacare, they do it down at the car wash. You know that long, black hose hanging on the wall……

  50. Bman says:

    hehe…50 cents for a wax is optional

  51. jacksonsdad says:

    They’d better buy me dinner first.

  52. sortahwitte says:

    The wax is included.

    That’s how they get it in.

  53. Locke n Load says:

    my GOD my wirelss bill is going to be expensive this month. Downloading everything I need into a new laptop is a massive bandwidth pain in the ass.

  54. Locke n Load says:

    Jen, I suspect the story IS true. Agreed, creepy stuff.
    It kind of reminds me of Y2K demands that were foisted on us by the Feds back when I was a broker. Everyone had to prove compliance in a number of ways and it drove us all nuts. Many of their demands seemed flat out stupid but the leviathan was gearing up for a perceived potential threat.

    if the bishops pantry locations are getting checked out I would imagine the same thing is going on again, only this time the Feds see US as the potential threat. I’m not alone in thinking we could see massive unrest by the end of next summmer. I’m not alone in thinking too many revolutionaries are lined up globally to make a concerted effort to upend western powers. Lastly, I’m not alone in believing that Iran or someone like them is now capable of pulling off an EMP attack. With us running what now appears to be a yearlong covert war with Iran (reference RDs Boom Boom Boom stuff as well as the recent Drone downing) I’d say they might just be anticipating all hell breaks loose soon.

    However you slice it, the Feds have NO right to demand those customer lists. And they have NO right to inventory our self defence stores either. You’re a tick in the hide of the leviathan now, maybe YOU can sniff out the truth ๐Ÿ™‚

  55. notamobster says:

    Good thing nobody knows what I have – so long as you guys don’t tell anyone. ๐Ÿ™‚

  56. Locke n Load says:

    Shit, who could even find you ๐Ÿ™‚

  57. notamobster says:

    Its easy – I’m in the shadow of 135+/- (400′ tAll) wind turbines, now.

  58. Jim22 says:

    Bigfurhat wants evidence that Newt is a progressive.

    “Yesterday I requested that people list Gingrich progressive policies that have ever become law. I wasnโ€™t looking for things he has said, or places he might have worked as a private citizen, or thoughts heโ€™s expressed as an intellectual compromise.

    There was only one taker, and that person listed a co-sponsored bill from 1989, on Global Warming, that went nowhere. Newt is no longer a believer in AGW or itโ€™s โ€œsolutionโ€, cap and trade. I am not fearful of Gingrich flip-flopping on this.”

    Anybody want to help him out?

  59. Notamobster says:

    Fever, aches, vomiting, diarhea…. Wow. This is rough.

  60. Locke n Load says:

    aw hell, no fun there buddy
    u know the drill…soup n sleep

  61. sortahwitte says:

    My friend, I know this may make you hurl more……but:

    When the stomach rolls, I sip a little dill pickle juice. I know.. but the vinegar seems to help me almost immediately. If that fails, hot toddies and rest. May you rest easy, bro.

  62. slaphappypap says:

    There is no such thing as sick for me this month. I had a tenant that left in the middle of the night on Thanksgiving.

  63. Locke n Load says:

    Pickle juice works for me too Sorta. I prefer Bitters and Ginger Ale tho. Bitters works wonders.

    Can’t believe my luck. Damned Atlanta drivers.. For the first time in my driving career I shifted a Hazmat load significantly enough to require reloading. I hope those asshats appreciate how I didn’t run over their stupid cars. Driving in Atlanta is a bloodsport. Ugh. Now I have to spend 2 hrs tomorrow getting it rearranged before I cross the Mississppi scales and final in Houston. Wonderful. 650 miles AND a 2 hr hassle. Grrrrrrr.

  64. R.D. Walker says:

    Rapper Freddie Gibbs is a buddy-fucker. A TSA agent did him a solid and he responded by likely getting the man fired.

    Another TSA Officer Leaves Personalized Note In Passenger’s Bag (After Finding Marijuana)

    That will be the last time anybody passed through unmolested with weed. Good job Freddie.

  65. D2A says:

    LnL, at least you do not have to drive in Atlanta traffic on a daily basis, like myself.
    Going to and from work is a test of patience, alertness and timely aggression.

  66. DarthJay says:

    Anyone have any insight on this 1 Trillion behemoth that passed in the house today? I though the Republicans got elected because the Dems were spending to much?!

  67. R.D. Walker says:

    I am working up a post on it DJ.

    The bottom line is that the Leviathan has a life of its own and can no longer be stopped by man. It will, however, eventually die. It has its own demise programmed in. That which cannot continue will not continue.

    The bad news is that it is going to thrash around and cause a lot of damage as it dies.

  68. Jim22 says:

    The Israelis are developing an airport security device that eliminates the privacy concerns that come with full-body scanners. It’s an armored booth you step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on your person.

    Israel sees this as a win-win situation for everyone, with none of this crap about racial profiling. It will also eliminate the costs of long and expensive trials.

    You’re in the airport terminal and you hear a muffled explosion. Shortly thereafter, an announcement: โ€œAttention to all standby passengers, El Al is proud to announce a seat is now available on flight 670 to London . Shalom!โ€

  69. Bman says:

    These flash mobs are really starting to get out of hand. Thank God no one got hurt!

    Actually, it is quite sweet ๐Ÿ™‚

  70. Air Force Brat says:

    Go Grandmas! This type of thing almost — almost — restores my faith in humankind. It’s nice to see that there still are some (humans) inhabiting the Earth.

  71. jacksonsdad says:

    Boy howdy I loves me some Bush!

    “In short, we must choose between the straight line promised by the statists and the jagged line of economic freedom. The straight line of gradual and controlled growth is what the statists promise but can never deliver. The jagged line offers no guarantees but has a powerful record of delivering the most prosperity and the most opportunity to the most people. We cannot possibly know in advance what freedom promises for 312 million individuals. But unless we are willing to explore the jagged line of freedom, we will be stuck with the straight line. And the straight line, it turns out, is a flat line.”

  72. RJM says:

    FBI Crime Reports Drop in Cedar Rapids and US!

    The Cedar Rapids police chief takes credit for a 50% drop in robberies, for the first half of 2011, credits “police persistence!”

    I wonder how much influence the Iowa change in Jan 2011 from a “may issue” to “shall issue” for concealed carry permits?

  73. RJM says:

    Here’s a handy little chart that shows crime rate per households with guns. It shows clearly that the more households that have guns also have a lower crime rate. Surprise! Surprise! (Channeling Gomer from Mayberry.)

    Amazingly Califorinia and Illinois are “not available!” Gee I wonder why 2 of the strictest states on gun control don’t share their information?

  74. RJM says:

    Correction, Washington D.C. is also not available.

  75. Slaphappypap says:

    Guess who the Democrats want to pay for the payroll tax cut? Home buyers!! Punch to the middle class again. Harry Reid ya jerk!

  76. R.D. Walker says:

    I ended up going with the Leupold VX-II 3-9x50mm for my M1A. I bought it at Bass Pro Shops in Des Moines yesterday.

  77. MadBrad says:

    Just got a call from the Shrimp Boat reporting a missile launch from the Kings Bay Trident Sub Base area. I just stepped outside to watch it. That was one fast moving rocket.

    It’s pretty odd to look North and see a missile launch. If we see any more I’ll give y’all a heads up.